I work long hours during the week and most evenings enjoy winding down by meeting up with friends online for a nice, relaxing chat. I'm drawn to those with a sense of humor and quick wit. I kind of feed off of it actually; might have something to do with the fact that I sometimes have a twisted sense of humor myself. Life's much more fun if you can laugh about the everyday things that we do.
I aspire to become the best me that I can be. I'm constantly changing and growing mentally but one thing that remains the same is that I stay true to myself. I like that peer pressure no longer matters. I enjoy learning new things that help me in my career, that make my life a little easier, that make me smile and give me pride in what I do.
I enjoy reading, cooking / baking, watching sappy tug-at-your-heart movies that make you cry, spending time with friends and family, and breakfast on the weekends.
--- Words of Wisdom ---
In everything, look to the good.(Not sure if anyone actually said that; it's just a motto that I live by.) Common courtesy is a classic that will never go out of style. And, damn'd if it's not sexy on a man, too!* (I added that last part.)
Don’t be someone’s downtime, spare time, part time or sometime. If they can’t be there for you all of the time, then they’re not even worth your time. ~Unknown
Seasonal Jokes:
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "In honor of this holy season," Saint Peter said, "You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven." The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He clicked it on. "It represents a candle," he said. "You may pass through the pearly gates." Saint Peter said. The second man reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, "They're bells." Saint Peter said, "You many pass through the pearly gates." The third man started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of woomen's panties. Saint Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, "And just what do those symbolize?" The man replied, "These are Carol's." :D
Late one evening on a long quiet ride home, a guy found himself in a mood and as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles."He pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his "need." In the process, he apparently failed to notice the police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until the officer approached him. The officer went up to him and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?' He got real surprised, as you'd expect, and then without missing a beat said, "A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"
Jokes in General
A man took his dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. They decided to grab a bite at the food court. The young man noticed his father watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors - green, red, orange, and blue.
The older man tried but just couldn’t seem to take his eyes off the teenager. The teenager noticed the old man staring. When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked: “What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?”
Knowing his Dad, the young man quickly swallowed his food so that he wouldn’t choke on his response; he knew his dad would have a good one! In classic style the old man responded without batting an eyelid:
“Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son..."
Two guys were out walking and saw a dog licking himself. One of the guys says, "Man! I sure wish I could do that!" His friend looked at him and said, "That dog would bite youuuuuu!!"
An elderly couple, Margaret and Bert, moved to Texas . Bert always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots, so, seeing some on sale, he bought them and wore them home. Walking proudly, he sauntered into the kitchen and said to his wife, 'Notice anything different about me?' Margaret looked him over 'Nope.' Frustrated, Bert stormed off into the bathroom, undressed and walked back into the kitchen completely naked except for the boots. Again he asked Margaret, a little louder this time, 'Notice anything different NOW?' Margaret looked up and exclaimed, 'Bert, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow!!' Furious, Bert yelled, 'AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, MARGARET?' 'Nope', she replied. 'IT'S HANGING DOWN, BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!" Without changing her expression, Margaret replied, 'Shoulda bought a hat, Bert. Shoulda bought a hat!'
*** THOUGHTS TO PONDER ***
I don't know WHY I didn't figure this out sooner!!!! It's the shampoo I use in the shower! When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body and (duh!) printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning: FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY! NO wonder I have been gaining weight!!!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn dish soap instead. Their label reads, DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.