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BlameitontheDog's Profile

Current Mood: Pensive
BlameitontheDog (Bubie, Lipschitz)
Male
Male - 69 years old, Mosquitoville, Canada
sexort
Sexual Orientation: Straight/Heterosexual
Relationship Status: Married


Updated: 2024-01-30 8:06:11 am Viewed 7,494 times Likes 16

About me:

I'm a happily married, boring guy who likes to blend in. I'm 68 years old (the last time I looked) and I try to act my age. I have a Grade 8 education with a B+ in geography. I bank my money. I have grey hair. I was in Grade 3 when JFK was shot. I was 12 when the Leafs last won the Stanley Cup. My new-to-me vehicle is a Toyota Tundra...that's right, I bought a truck. Oddly, I now have this urge to ditch my whole 1980s CD compilation and d/l Grath Brooks songs. My political views are veering right. Now that I've done my research, and I regret getting vaccinated.  I still part my hair, however, and still vote Liberal but will probably switch to a party with policies more in line with my current outlook; become a neo-Con, as it were. As ever, I wear sensible leather shoes, polished, and  sleeveless undershirts with neither irony or ironing.  My kids yawn in my face. I eat pizza with a knife and fork. I wear slippers in the house, and pyjamas in bed. A big day for me is cutting the grass and making straight lines. Any dog I've ever owned won't come when I call it. Watching paint dry is more exciting than my life. You probably think I'm kidding... but I'm not

More detail:

I'm kinda shallow and uninteresting. Anything written above grade school level is 'way over my head. During the day, I work my monotonous job, then go home to my lacklustre bungalow and have a drink with my dear wife of nearly 40 years. The poor woman! she must get restless, suffering day after day, in silence, living with her dreary, boring husband, but she loves me too much to say anything...at least, I think she does. After all these years, I can't tell. I wonder sometimes why she hasn't left me for greener pastures. She seems to enjoy TV shows with desert islands and younger men in bathing suits...I ask you, dear reader...do you think she's contemplating a fling? Don't answer. I have a wild side....I just suppress it. For example, when the mood strikes, I release the inner wild man by putting premium gas in my truck, opening the sunroof, then driving around playing soft rock music!  I know, right? And in order to keep up with younger 'dudes', I'm experimenting with yoga, too. This weekend, if the weather's nice, I'll vacuum my truck. Thoroughly. Not  that it needs it.
 

Even More Detail:

I curl all winter. I ride my bikes, fish and cut grass all summer, but I drink beer all year long, except in winter, when I switch to rum and coke. With the delusion typical of an ageing male, I see myself as a cyclist rather than a mere bicycle rider, citing the credo 'Riding a bike is what you DO, but a cyclist is what you ARE'.  I read books about sea captains in the age of fighting sail. My taste in literature has been called 'juvenile'-by a sniggering, effete, pansified English teacher-all because I like defined roles...good guys, bad guys and the women that love them. Nothing wrong with that, it just shows outdated values.  Every modern-day head of household needs a place to get away, and my garage is my refuge from the hurly-burly of modern life. I have an FM stereo radio and TV set out there, plus my bar bells, comic books and lots of Mountain Dew. That weightlifting is paying off. I get compliments in chat. Just the other day a female chatter squealed "Whao, Blameo!...you remind me of my ex!" and all the other girls signaled their agreement by lolling. I was once compared to Pee Wee Herman for liking my bicycle so much. It's nice to know I get respect from my peers.

 

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