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°Christopher°Tracy°'s Profile

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°Christopher°Tracy° (Christopher, Tracy)
Male
Male - 48 years old, Midwest, United States
sexort
Sexual Orientation: Straight/Heterosexual
Relationship Status: Long-Term Relationship


Updated: 2020-11-15 8:19:44 pm Viewed 2,852 times Likes 2

 

Compulsive Serial (Self-pleasurer)

Bondage impresario, pleasure aficionado and avid shoe wearer.

The Polyamorists Next Door

 

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   cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.

Shenanigans, Tom foolery, and various nonsense 
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Interested in “kitchen table poly.” Kitchen table poly being the full time live-in situation where we all live, work and love together as a team and family.

 

 A Dominant should be in control of himself first and foremost, he needs to be confident, caring and understanding. He does not allow his ego to get in the way of his learning, both about himself and his submissive; he knows how to love along with cherishing the gift of her given to him.

When the Dominant meets a new submissive He is kind and guiding without demanding ritual of Her, He does not demand respect, he earns it, He explores her mind first, learning her strengths, He does not seek to seduce her , but gets to know her as a person first, building a relationship, slowly discovering if there is to be one.

As a good Dominant he does not do this to gain another submissive, but only because he is able to befriend someone, without the trappings of sexuality, He is not a predator, but a teacher, willing to pass his knowledge with little or no reward, but the pleasure of knowing he can, and the satisfaction of helping someone define their own path.

He knows his safety also depends on Honesty, on communication, He is at first only as protective of himself he needs to need be, but open and Honest about his life, tastes, what he expects, he knows that she will be taking a leap of faith, and is supportive of her.

To possess her he Knows he must first earns her respect, to do this He must prove he is what he says he is, that he cares for her, that he would push her limits only to build her strengths, that he is willing to spend the time to learn her as a Person first, then as a submissive, He knows how wonderful this gift is that she offers, and is willing to live up to her trust in him.

10 Golden Rules for Negotiations

1. You are an adult and are responsible for your own safety. Do not give up your rights or your sensibilities as an adult and put yourself in danger. Mental and physical abuse are not part of what we do. Never.

2. If you are new or about to begin with someone new, set very short goals for your first encounters. You can escalate the level of your relationship later. Start small. Build from there. If meeting outside of a public venue, follow every established rule for safe first encounters.

3. Define your safe words. Use them if you need to. Know where the door is and know that you can use it, too. Never put yourself into a situation where you have no experience with someone and cannot access the door if you choose to leave.

4. Familiarize yourself with the lingo of BDSM, kink, and fetish and discuss your interpretation of words and phrases. The same thing can mean different things to different people.

5. Define your limits for your partner as well as your experience allows you to do it. Then stick by your limits until the next negotiation about them.

6. You are equal to the other person in this negotiation, whether you consider yourself Top, bottom, Master, slave, Dominant, submissive, switch or whatever other label you can find. After the negotiations, the equality arrangement may be different. But until an agreement is reached, you have just as many rights as the other person.

7. Go with your gut. If something feels wrong, it probably is wrong for you. Address that issue up front. And remember rule number 3. Always know where the door is if you need it.

8. You may be negotiating in good faith, but you have to be aware that the other person might not be doing the same thing either through inexperience or bad intentions. Be wary of coercion like, “if you are a real submissive, you will….”, or “I can only be with a real Dominant who does….”. These are negotiations and there should be give and take. If someone is throwing roadblocks to your negotiations or issuing you ultimatums, you should recognize them as problems and consider why you are still there.

9. If the other person presents a make or break issue that does not suit you but they will not budge on, consider the deal is already broken and move on. If they concede it grudgingly, and mutter under their breath that you “will do it eventually...", beware. When you are involved in a BDSM negotiation, hard limits are to be respected. A later negotiation may change the hard limits, but without a new negotiation, established limits have to be respected.

10. BDSM Negotiation is about finding your personal happiness and fulfillment. It is about establishing trust and opening up within your relationship. Keep those goals in mind as you negotiate with your partner. Keep your eye on the prize. Good partners will always work towards each other’s mutual happiness. They will not be looking to take things at someone else's expense.

 

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Lucy cried, I almost died, you know what we found?

Starfish and coffee
Maple syrup and jam
Butterscotch clouds, a tangerine
And a side order of ham

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Learning links:

http://www.submissiveguide.com/

http://www.the-iron-gate.com/

http://www.steel-door.com

http://www.leathernroses.com

http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/

http://www.sexuality.org/l/bdsm/domadvic.html

http://www.bcwsd.com/backroom/

http://submissive1.homestead.com/healthysub.html

http://www.vanilla-not.com/basics/index.html