I am not currently available right now. However, if you would like to be transfered to another correspondent, please press the number that best fits your personality mono If you are obsessive compulsive, please press "1" repeatedly.-If you are codependant, please ask someone to press "2".-If you have multiple personalitites, please press "3", "4", and "5".-If you are paranoid delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace your call.-If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and the little voice will tell you which number to press.-If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter what number you press, no one will answer

I used to hate it when aunts and grandmas, used to come up to me at weddings and pinch my cheeks and say "Your next" "Your next". Well they stopped doin that crap when i started to do it to them at funerals

If you really want something in this life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers

this is this cat/this was is cat/this is how cat /this was to cat/ this is keep cat/ this was a cat /this is idiot cat /this was busy cat Ok? Now read the 3rd word in every line!